The Struggle...

We've all had those days.

You know, the ones where we forget to set our coffee pot the night before and our usual cup of joe isn't ready for us when we wake up in the morning; we close the locked door of our house to walk to our car only to realize that our keys are sitting on the kitchen table; we set our alarm before bed and sleep through morning yoga because we set the time to PM not AM; we spent our Sunday afternoon meal prepping for the week and forget our lunch at home on Monday. The real.

And maybe there are bigger issues that you're facing beyond locking yourself out of your house or sleeping through your 6AM yoga class. Are you working in a job that you hate? Are you in a relationship that makes you miserable? Do you feel like you just can't catch a break and that bad things "just happen" to you and there's nothing you can do about it? Would you believe me if I told you that these things aren't "just happening" to you, and you're the reason they're in your life?

I don't mean that to sound harsh, but I want you to realize that whatever unpleasant or less than ideal situation you're in right now, you're in total control of how things happen from here on out. Sounds too good to be true? It's not. Right now, you're giving the negative situations you're in too much power and we're going to talk about how to get that power back.

Let's take work for example since it's the place where we spend the majority of our days.

You're in a job that you're just not meshing with. Maybe it's your very first job or a position that you took as a stepping stone to somewhere else. Day in and day out, it sucks. As soon as you wake up, you start your day dreading going to work. You prepare yourself on your commute for the stressful day you know "just know" that you're going to have. As soon as you sit down at your desk, you're already looking at the clock to figure out how many hours until you get to go home again. The work itself is grueling, tedious and mundane. While you're at the office, you can't shake the constant feeling of frustration and resentment.  Panic sets in and you feel trapped. You know you need find something else, something better, but just don't know how. Before you passively scroll through job boards (where I'm willing to bet that everything that populates in your search is just like the job you're in now), I want to challenge you to take a different approach:

Set aside 20-30 minutes at some point during your day and find a quiet place with minimal distractions, including your phone (you'll survive 20 minutes without it -- promise). Grab a pen and paper and sit down somewhere where you can write. First, think of the job you have right now (I know, I know...) and write down 3-5 things that you do like about it. Do you get to work from home? Do you have a really easy commute? Does the company promote great work-life balance? Whatever it may be, write those things down and in doing so, smile (yup, really!) and let yourself feel happy as you're jotting those things down (I know, just go with it). Got 'em written down? Great. Now is the really fun part: on that same piece of paper, write "New Job" and underline it. Under that title, write down all of the things that you want in your new job. Write down the title of your position, the compensation you wish to receive -- don't be afraid to use your imagination here, the possibilities are endless. Once your list is complete, read through each bullet item and visualize that coming true. Imagine receiving your offer letter from your new company with your name, your title and your new compensation (bonus points if you take it a step further and write up an offer letter to keep somewhere where you'll see it often). Did you list having an easy commute as one of your items? Envision yourself riding your bike or walking to the office with the traffic of cars or public transportation buzzing around you as you take in the sights and sounds. Truly visualize each item on your list one by one.

How are you feeling as your picturing these things? Excited? Happy? Energized? Good! You're getting your power back.

What a lot of people don't realize is that the situation they're in right now is temporary and is based largely in part on how they're feeling about that situation. When we're constantly thinking or talking about how much we hate our job (or relationship or whatever), chances are, we feel pretty miserable in that moment as we talk or think about it. And if we're feeling miserable all of the time, nothing new and good can come into our lives. Call it law of attraction, call it manifestation, call it whatever you want...but I promise you that the more you think of, dwell on and talk about negative things in your life, the more negative things you will experience. Is this already happening in your own life?

What if you did the opposite? How many problems will magically subside, how many doors will open, how many random amazing opportunities will come your way when you're thinking of, talking about, fixating on all of the positive things in your life? You know that feeling you get when you have something fun or exciting to look forward to and the butterflies and excited nerves well up in your body to the point where you almost can stand it? That's what we're aiming for here...because that's how your life should be -- a series of things that make you constantly excited and that you look forward to.

Will this change with your job (or relationship or house or business opportunity) happen overnight? Of course not. But do you have the power to facilitate that change for yourself? You betcha. Go back to your list and think of all of the wonderful things you want for yourself. Or, maybe not even that you "want" for yourself, but that you "see" happening for yourself. Reflect on this list as much as you can until it almost becomes second nature and you begin to expect your "wish" list to be your reality. You can literally apply this exercise in any aspect of your life -- the key is getting your mind out of the "right now" (the bad) and focusing on the "what will be" (the good and exciting).

Don't let the temporary struggle keep you from creating the life you want! You got this.


MindMary Beth Mannino